Sunday 21 November 2010

Have you ever felt trapped? How do I make myself love my husband when he's so mean and nasty to me?

If I disagree with him about anything he looks at me with such hate in his eyes it chills my blood. He has a quick temper especially when he's tired and gets me in a corner with his hands on each side of me so that I can't move and screams loudly in my face. He says he isn't abusing me because he's not hitting me but he leaves my ears ringing and my hands shaking for hrs. Am I so wrong to have fallen in love with another man who's kind to me and loves me? I can't leave my husband and we can't be together for reasons I can't say but I love this other man deeply and he's all I have. People on here say I'm wrong (especially the men) but should I remain loveless the rest of my life? I have tried so hard to love my husband, over and over, but I can't. I plan to continue with this other man as long as I can. Am I so wrong to glean what little pleasure I can from life? What would you do?Have you ever felt trapped? How do I make myself love my husband when he's so mean and nasty to me?
divorce sounds like the right move but jumping right into another relationship isn't the answer either. There are many issues with YOU that are not being addressed. Leaving one bad relationship without working on ones self first will only carry over into the next relationship. One must first learn to love oneself before you love someone else. Learn how to be compete without having to have a man define your happiness that way when someone comes along you can say Hey I was already happy before I met this guy he just further enhances my life. Sounds like you are depended on the other guy for happiness and people are not designed that way. Eventually you will disappointed and unhappy again. Seek a counselor and strongly suggest you work on self first.Have you ever felt trapped? How do I make myself love my husband when he's so mean and nasty to me?
Thanks!

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Leave you husband. There are different kinds of abuse physical, emotional It will never get better I know from experience and know I'm in the best relationship of my life. Is this the way you want to spend the rest of your life, find someone that makes you happy
Sounds like the love is gone I would leave him, life is too short to spend time with someone you can't stand when you could be with someone you love
you are giving the devil a field day--forget another man, make up your mind to love your husband, be devoted to him and answer his meaness with loving kindness, i would go to Jesus and trust in Him. You took vows, you are commited, just humble yourself, as long as you even think of another man--your husband will always appear bad in your mind.
i understand u r not wrong. though i m a man but i feel u r not wrong. he s wrong for what he s doing .... but give him chance for few months or a year.... be polite in behaviour. dont object whats . in a couple there s one thing... among the two ,,, one must be calm and cool in case of discussions. dont disagree though he s wrong.... see .... u may win his heart.... dont be a sign of complain for him.... see his likes and dislikes.... if again no response after a year....or less.. then leave him .... he does not worth u....
Dont say you cant leave its as easy as walking out the door. I walked out and left all I owned behind. I had to start over and it was the best thing i ever did. I don't nessisarly think what you have with this guy is wrong but what happens if your husband finds out it could be real bad for both of you do you realize that you are putting this man you loves life in danger by staying with your husband you need to make a choice and either leave your love and stay with this nut or crush the nut and have your love. You know as well as we do what he is doing is abuse and the police dont' like abusers neither do judges. So why are you still there?
Your husband is emotionally abusing you. How long have you endured this? You are not wrong for wanting to be happy, wether you found it with someone else or not. My God! No one can live like you forever! You need to get away from that man like yesterday! Stop trying to love him and get out of there before he either hurts you or you get so fed up with the abuse and you hurt yourself! If you are still with your husband when the relationship with the other man comes to an end you will crash. I am saying this because I have seen it happen. Your whole world will implode on you. Don't let that happen! Get out while you have your sanity sweetie.
why r you still there? go with the other guy he treats you the way you want so why r you not living with that guy ?let that guy help you get outta there ,run baby run...
Move out and file for a divorce.You can't force yourself to love anyone that abuses you in any way.And he is verbally abusing you.Get out before it gets any worse,and it will,most of your abusers start out verbally abusing there victims and then they escalate to the physical abuse.I know from personal experience I watched my mother go through it for years before she was able to get away from her abuser.And he almost killed her.Don't take any more chances than you already have,GET OUT NOW.

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